Getting to the Heart of the Matter

The Heart of the Matter is this: God love us, He really loves us, He only has good things for us, He brings understanding, He loves us!!! This last week, I have opened myself up to going back in my past to see some things that still need healing to find true full breakthrough in life. It can be scary, to go back, to look at things we are not so proud of and want to forget. The good thing about this is that we can find the love of the Father with each look. Horrendous things may have happened to us, or maybe not, but the Father longs to show you His love, His hand, how he worked together for your good!!! The tendency for most folks in this world is to blame God, when trials and tribulations come, things we can't understand, don't want to understand, we blame God. The truth is this, God wants good for His children, He loves all, sent His Son to die for all, He works everything for our good because He loves us!! Putting that into perspective, I had this thought. You know how when tragedy strikes, difficult circumstance, cancer, layoffs, or just rotten things happen? Our tendency often times is to take it out on those we love and who love us. Our tendency is to push them away. Why do we do that? I have asked myself this same question. Part of me believes it is because we know they will love us in spite of our momentary insanity, part of it, I believe is that we are daring them to show us how much they love us. So, in relation to blaming God for disaster, difficulty, sickness and tragedy, are we blaming God, venting to Him? because we are daring Him to show up and show how much He loves us? He is always there, He is always available, He is always loving you, loving me, He is eager to show us more of His love. He is not offended by your blame, by my blame. He wants us to desire Him. If it's a dare, he will show up!! He will love you, heck he already does love you!! Just a thought, as i sit here talking with him about life, and asking for more understanding. So take some time to talk with Him, He is always available, He will answer, He will reply with LOVE, HOPE, PEACE, JOY!!!!!! Give him the chance!!

Moving on Up!!

So today I find myself living in Redding, California!! What a journey the last year has been. It has been over 8 months since my return from Thailand and Cambodia. And I had no clue not even a year later, I would move from all I knew in Arkansas to a place called Redding, California. Population half of Little Rock and same heat less humidity, a place with homeless on every corner, Me: living in an apartment that I tell folks it's in the alley between Carl Jr's and the 7/11, but alas here I am. I moved here a little over 2 months ago in search for MORE of God, my desire to understand how to host the Presence of Holy Spirit. My move brought me to Redding to be a part of Bethel Church. Bethel's main pastor is Bill Johnson. I was transformed by Holy Spirit through Bill's teachings, understanding more the simplicity of loving God, seeking His Presence. My desire to search out the hidden things of Christ has been heightened as I am placed in front of folks everyday asking about God's love through the vast questions of why hell? will dead be raised? why did Ananias and Sapphira have to die? Many other questions have surfaced from others that I am hesitant to admit have never crossed my mind. But it is in these questions, that I find myself in His Presence knowing that is the place where the answers lie. Sure, I could look at commentary after commentary, yet in His Presence is fullness of Joy, in His Presence is wisdom and revelation. In His Presence is TRUTH! So while people may question my beliefs and understandings of Christ and dispute these many things, I am content to trust His Voice. The things I may not understand, I trust His heart! Knowing HE loves all wishing none to perish! This is where I find myself on the beautiful August day in Redding. I just began reading "Visions Beyond the Veil" by HA Baker. I found truth so quickly and am not even on the 2nd chapter. It's the truth that resonates through my soul, flesh, and spirit. A truth that made me want to jump for joy, yet I must admit I contained myself a bit as I sit in Starbucks and am not fond of the staring, well not as much as I used to be haha! The truth was this: In speaking of the ministry of the Bakers who began a home for boys with many issues this is what was said of the children who were speaking revelations from above, "They sought Christ! We did not see anyone seeking visions or any of the manifestations that were received day by day, as they all single-heartedly prayed and praised the Lord Jesus. He alone was sought and magnified throughout..." pg 12 That is where I want to live! I want to seek Christ and Him alone. I find myself periodically getting wrapped up in why can't I see this or that healing, or have this vision. Yet when I am still and sure, I know His Presence is greater than any manifestation and sign. Yet in Him alone is where we find Christ in His fullness which comes with all of the signs and wonders. So this is where we begin the next chapter in Redding, California. I will be talking more about what has been going on here and the favor I have found in seeking God more, the opportunities I have been given. But for now this is where I am seeking Him in His fullness and finding unspeakable joy!! Until next time...